I’m now in my hometown. I arrived last August 3, with 52 kilos of excess baggage and mixed feelings. I was heart broken. I will miss the people I love and as weird as it may sound, it feels like I betrayed them for leaving. But I am happy, too that I will be with my family. I never thought I’d live with my parents again, reclaim my space in our house. But home is where the heart is, and I would like to spend as much time with them as possible. Maybe, I’ll move out again soon, but it will be somewhere nearer, closer to home.
In the past two weeks, I was adjusting in the new lifestyle. It’s definitely better not to deal with any traffic at all. I don’t need to worry about food nor laundry. Things really are easier. I’m also spending more time with my mom and siblings. I’m back at my old church. Life is slower.
I go to the gym now, three times a week. I eat healthier food, more fruits because they’re way cheap here. I watch cable. Yes! Goodbye tv tuner! I take afternoon walks. I went to the beach twice already. I have gone darker but loving it. Life is wonderful.
But of course, there are many things I miss. Like, every time I pass by Mcdonalds, I miss my girls. Everytime I see Ryan on his swish ad, I miss them even more. I keep thinking about gabs, how he is, what is he doing at every instant. My cellphone bill has escalated, but who cares. It’s more important to be in touch with the people we love.
There are things to worry too. Like my mom not feeling well most times, my siblings and their school, papa and his work and health, my weight and the desperation to shed some unwanted fats. I also think about my future career here. I still have no clear plans as of the moment.
I feel like my life has gained a balance. I am emotionally healthy now as compared to the emo girl that I was. I no longer complain. I laugh more. I give more. I even like kids now, fending my niece and nephew. I am thankful for many reasons. I’m definitely not regretting this decision I made.
